Category Archives: Random Access

Random Access, the op-ed.

Didya Vote?

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The polls have closed in the East so I figure it’s safe to tell you how I voted as opposed to telling you over and over how you ought to vote. We have to whisper, though.

I voted for the old white guy instead of the young black guy or the other old white guys or all the other guys.

I know, I know, I said I was going to vote for Paris Hilton. And I did engender a brief flurry of interest in the Pick Dick campaign. I thought about Jimmy Buffett but his running mate never made the news. I would have voted for his uncle but he was never really a candidate.

Down here by the southernmost point in these semi-United States our ballots had 14 bona fide offices contested plus six judges up for retention. We also decided on six amendments to the state constitution, numbered 1 through 8. It’s Florida. Go figure.

I didn’t count how many candidates there were in total but 13 people wanted my vote for President. We have now elected a Congress critter, a state attorney, a state representative, a Sheriff, a property appraiser, the superintendent of schools I wrote about earlier, the supervisor of elections, three county commissioners, and two members of the mosquito control board.

The Mosquito Control Board is a big deal here simply because mosquitoes are. Here, that is. The Board controls about a gazillion dollar budget but no longer flies the old fleet of DC3s at treetop level to scare the mosquitoes to death. Now they drive around spraying from little pickup trucks and fly helicopters lower than Homeland Security. I did not vote for the candidate who was in jail at the time of the election. Joan Lord-Papy was one of three votes I cast for an incumbent.

Mostly I took my own advice to “Throw Da Bums Out.” The other two office holders I voted for were Congresswoman Ileana Ros-Lehtinen (R-Florida) and Property Appraiser Ervin Higgs, a Democrat. Ms. Ros-Lehtinen ran a reasonably clean campaign (a serious rarity in South Florida politics where the Diaz-Balart brothers, Raul Martinez, and Joe Garcia alone refilled Lake Okeechobee and the Everglades with mud). She may also be the only Republican who retains a seat in Congress this year if my vote has anything to say about it.

Unfortunately, every Democrat running will be returned to office, too.

The negatives were huge on both sides of the State’s Attorney contest so I held my nose and voted for the challenger.

State Rep. Ron Saunders will continue as the Keys representative. It’s nice that he seems like another of the good guys because Republican challenger Ernie Hernandez withdrew from the race in September. Hernandez was a mystery. He did not talk to reporters, attend candidate forums, or gladhand anywhere. His name remained on the ballots printed before he withdrew. The Elections Office will not count votes for Hernandez.

The Sheriff’s Office was an open seat but one candidate has served in that department for 27 years, is currently a Captain there, and got the retiring Sheriff’s endorsement. That’s as close to incumbency as it gets. I voted for the DEA guy.

Two of the three County Commission seats were open so I voted for one Republican, one Democrat, and one NPA. I figure party politics has no business on a Town. City, or County board. The Democrat I chose, Heather Carruthers, runs a “we are not gay” guest house for women only. She got hammered unfairly for that in the campaign. She has also taken the lead in reining in Citizens Insurance, the insurer of last resort who carries my hurricane insurance here at great cost to me. She seems like one of the good guys.

I’ve had trouble finding anything about the judges on the ballot. The Florida bar said their lawyers “overwhelmingly recommend” retaining all those on the ballot. Here’s how they define “overwhelmingly”: A secret ballot was mailed in August to 62,779 lawyers residing and practicing in Florida (the Bar has more than 84,000 members–I don’t know what happened to the other 21,000-odd lawyers). 4,132 lawyers participated in the poll. Yeppers, I’m overwhelmed alright.

The anti-abortion crowd asked, How does Justice Wells vote on pro-life issues? The anti-abortion crowd is, as usual, off base. He’s not a U.S. Supreme Court Justice so his position prolly doesn’t matter. More important in all the retention choices is how closely to the law did the judges hew and how well did they manage their courtrooms.

The spouse of circuit judge candidate Tegan Slaton is Public Defender Rosemary Enright; that requires him to recuse himself from cases defended by the P.D.’s office. I hated to vote against Mr. Slaton because he was the better candidate on paper, but his inability to hear the majority of criminal and juvenile delinquency cases took him out of the running.

In addition to wanting term limits for elected officials, I disapprove of changing a constitution every time the wind blows. Two amendments are life-changing.

Fortunately, Constitutional amendments need 60% support to pass.

Number 1 asks to delete the provisions that allow the Legislature to prohibit ownership of real property by aliens who cannot become citizens. In 1926, that meant Chinese immigrants. 80 years later, alien means anyone who remains a citizen of some other country.

You already know what I think of Defense of Marriage amendments. I expect Number 2 to fail here in Monroe County but this is red state Florida and it has a lot of advertising oomph around the state. The amendment failed to get enough signatures to make it to the 2006 ballot but the supporters pushed it on this year. It’s a bad amendment because it segregates citizens and because it will cost a fortune to defend.

That’s the only citizen-sponsored amendment on the ballot–the others are housekeeping, put there by the Legislature and a tax commission to “clean up” language that governs how properties are assessed: a couple of current use tax exemptions, 15 cents on the property tax to pay for the air ambulance, and the penn(ies) on the sales tax for community colleges. I apologize, but I did vote for allowing assessments based on current use. I voted against all the others.

Back to the old white guy.

<sotto voce> Denny Crane </sotto voce>, of course.

Unfortunately, the election is over. We all lost.

I Am Not an Educator (or When Academia Trumped Teaching)

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I am not an educator. I am, however, a pretty good teacher. I know this for a number of reasons. My grandfather taught chemistry at Temple for about a million years. He was not an educator either but he was a tenured professor. My cousin teaches biology at Perdue. I taught computer apps and technology at Vermont colleges. My students learned the material I taught and learned how to expand on it. I got pretty good grades, too.

I am not an educator. I didn’t vote for one to be superintendent of schools either.

So, what’s the difference between a teacher and an educator?

Educators talk about “graduation rates” and “resources” and “administrative needs” and “professional leadership.” Teachers simply make sure every student learns.

An Educator should make the system work.
A Teacher does make the student work.

I didn’t vote for the incumbent Superintendent of Schools here in the Keys because he advertised proudly that he had raised graduation rates “to 84%.” The Monroe County schools make up a “State of Florida A Rated School District.” In a state where a quarter of the kids drop out of high school, that statistic means more kids stay the course here. Unfortunately, it also means he still isn’t teaching 410.5 kids what they need to know and that’s just wrong. (As of 11/3/08, all Florida Keys public schools have a total of 2,566 students enrolled in grades 9, 10, 11, and 12.) I want to know what to do with the half a kid.

Our kids aren’t learning. Everybody knows it. And everybody points fingers. It’s the parents’ fault. No, it’s because the kids don’t eat breakfast. No, it’s because of television/Internet/cell phones. No, it’s because kids don’t get enough sleep.

Didya ever think it might maybe be the “educators” themselves?

Have you followed the trends in your school district? All of the techniques tried and discarded to improve test scores? Buzz words, all of them. Edu-speak designed not to improve teaching but to make education seem more professional. Professional? At the end of his term as president of Yale Kingman Brewster said, “Incomprehensible jargon is the hallmark of a profession.” He may have been talking to British managers but academia should have listened.

I have lived through Critical Thinking, Emergent Literacy, No Child Left, Portfolio Assessment, and Whole Language. I watched in awe as my cousin learned that 3 plus 5 equals purple. I have taught in a college that believes in neither tests nor grades (I gave both anyway). I learned about Discovery Learning, Lifelong Learning, and Mastery Learning.

Don’t get me wrong. Parents do need to read to their kids and to set boundaries. Kids do need nutrition and sleep. Kids do watch too much television. And so on.

Kids need teachers who teach.

Put up your hand if you had one. You know whom I mean, the life-changing teacher who inspired you. The teacher you visited when you went back to your school. The teacher you talk about at cocktail parties.

Want a superintendent who will fix your schools? Vote for the one who will fire all the educators and hire some teachers.

Of course if that many kids do drop out of your school, they can become garbologists instead of ordinary trashmen. God knows we need more trashmen.

A couple of interesting links:

Eduspeak: Learning the Lingo
Choosing a School

Obama a Great Christian

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You will never hear the words “We want to enslave you” from a left-wing American politician although most left-wing politicians will have you believe their counterparts, the right-wing politicians, want to keep slaves.

The North American Freedom Foundation (NAFF) defines slavery as “forced, unpaid service or work.” They include this caveat: “Due to its graphic content, this website is not suitable for children.”

That definition of slavery as the systematic exploitation of labor is incomplete. “Chattel slavery” refers to people who are the actual or apparent property of another person, company, or government. Let’s repeat that for emphasis: Chattel slaves are the apparent property of a government.

And we haven’t even thought about wage slavery, peonage, debt bondage, or indenture. Or the fact that slaves cannot refuse to work (“unemployment” as well as “workfare” programs). Slaves cannot leave home without explicit permission (meaning they need a passport). And so on.

Evidences of slavery predate the written history in Sumer where history itself began; man has enslaved other men on every continent and in every time that man has lived. It is so pervasive that the Universal Declaration of Human Rights of 1948 states: “No one shall be held in slavery or servitude; slavery and the slave trade shall be prohibited in all their forms.” Period.

There is a moral absolute there.

Many religions (including the entire Judeo/Christian/Islamist hierarchy) hold that their systems of morality derive from the commands of God.

There is an opposing moral absolute in religion.

Slavery “was established by decree of Almighty God … it is sanctioned in the Bible, in both Testaments, from Genesis to Revelation … it has existed in all ages, has been found among the people of the highest civilization, and in nations of the highest proficiency in the arts.” Jefferson Davis said in 1850. “The right of holding slaves is clearly established in the Holy Scriptures, both by precept and example.” Baptist minister Rev. R. Furman said.

Huh. The Bible endorses slavery?

Well, yes. Our Bible indeed recognizes and regulates the practice of keeping slaves (see Colossians 4:1, Deuteronomy 15:12-15, Ephesians 6:9, and First Timothy 6:1-2).

Makes slavery the Christian thing to do, innit. Slave owners would agree. Slave owners must provide everything for their slaves: housing, education, medical care, protection, and love. They do what is best for their slaves.

It’s the Christian thing to do.

Are Americans slaves?

The government already supplies most education, some housing, police protection, and guards the borders against all ingress as well as our egress.

The government Senator Obama would lead wants to take over all the medical care and love, too.

It’s the Christian thing to do.

Senator Obama has one moral absolute: he would lead all Americans on the path of righteousness for its own sake. In his world that is the path of total care, from cradle to grave. His left wing policies would take the sweat of our brows, all of it, and “give” us back our guards, our housing, our medical care, our policing, and our schooling. And, of course, his government would love us totally.

Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard about the “tax cuts.” Anything that increases the national debt ain’t a tax cut.

Owing your soul to the Company Store is slavery, no matter how you gussy it up.

Barack Obama must be a great Christian to want to further enslave us that way.

After all, it’s the Christian thing to do.

The news is all Election all the time. Even I have written about it a couple of times. Conventional wisdom holds that voters don’t usually think about the election until after the World Series. This is not a usual year. The Phillies and Tampa Bay are in the World Series. Most peeps don’t even know Tampa Bay has a baseball team so there is nothing else to talk about.

This morning, Radio Guy asked TV News Guy, “Is there anything else going on out there?” There is. There’s a school shooting in maybe Arkansas with a couple of deaths. I couldn’t even find that on Google news. And a TV news anchor, severely beaten in what police think was a random attack, has died. Oh, that was in Arkansas.

Throw da bums out. Then we’ll have something worthwhile to talk about.

Pelletized – IV

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Wood pellet sellers are worse than plumbers. And surgeons.

I wrote that “the highest [price] I’ve seen so far is $300” for a ton of hardwood pellets. That was way back in August and early September, four or even five weeks ago when supplies were apparently plentiful.

So we bought a stove.

Then I tried to buy pellets for it.

Vermont has more than two dozen dealers. I found, listed, and called the 15 or so within 50 miles of North Puffin. The typical response has ranged from “Gee, Dick, we don’t have any in stock right now” to “We’re simply not accepting orders–try calling back in November.”

Urk.

My best local fuel dealer still says, “Soon.” One hardware chain told me they had “one pallet of softwood pellets. Do you want it?” Not for the $313 they planned to charge. Another store said they had none in stock but I could keep calling on Wednesdays when their delivery truck arrived. A farm a long hour away by truck offers a “softwood single species from the Midwest” but they were sold out and didn’t know when any more would arrive. An outdoor furnace rep is “searching for a Canadian supplier.” Unsuccessfully so far. A couple of lumber yards and a couple of stove dealers sold stoves but no pellets.

The Energy Coop sells stoves but no pellets and has no plans to sell pellets.

I finally found a stove dealer 50 miles away with “truckloads coming in every other day.” He sells a premium-hard/softwood mixed-low ash pellet from Canada for $235/ton. I asked for two pallets.

“Sure,” they said.

That seller may have the most disorganized store I have ever done business with. I borrowed a 7,000 pound flatbed trailer, hitched it to the truck and drove right down.

Me: I called this morning for two skids. Where do you want me to park?
Them: We don’t have any left. Where’d you call from?
Me: North Puffin
Them: You’re the woman who called from Petuniaville?

I just looked over my glasses at them.

Anyway, they had promised me three tons and the woman from Petuniaville four tons. They had two wrapped skids (1.5 tons each) and one already opened skid with about one more ton. I arrived first so I got one wrapped skid and the still wrapped bottom half of the second, leaving a wrapped skid and 25 loose bags for the woman from Petuniaville.

She’s a stove buyer so she is gonna be mad.

The boss was on the phone when I arrived. He yelled at his peeps and said that from now on, only one person takes phone orders. He didn’t identify the order taker and I ‘spect nothing will change.

{shaking head}

I managed not to give them the benefit of my management expertise which is to say I carefully applied my management expertise not to give them the benefit of my thoughts.

I parked the pellet pallet porter and pickup by the porch where Anne and I pulled and pushed and packed 4,000 pounds in place.

Pallets o Pellets

I am pleased to report that the pellet stove just lit again. I am not pleased to report that I’ll have to do it all again in less than 100 days.

Running a new appliance means we accumulate some cost and usage info. I’ll post that next.

Pelletized – III

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Oooh, my back is gonna hurt tonight.

We bought a Quadra Fire Santa Fe pellet stove in Massachusetts. Then we drove it home. Then we had to move our existing “heating appliances” around to make room. See, we already had a Vermont Castings Vigilant in the great room and a cast iron “Franklin” stove in the parlor.

I over-engineered moving the Vigilant and thought that might take care of setting a new stove in place as well: attach a couple of 2x4s under the body, rig a cable or chain cradle, rent a pneumatic-rubber tired engine hoist, and simply roll it into place.

Oops. The feet of the hoist have to go under the body and the raised hearth in the parlor knocked that idea out. Not to mention that engine hoists have solid wheels.

The good news is that I have an engine dolly that is strong enough for two stoves and is just about the right height. The coal stove sits on it, awaiting a buyer. Rocking the coal stove turned out to be pretty easy. I lifted one end (the light one) and our son-in-law blocked the feet. He lifted the heavy end while I blocked the other feet. And the dolly slid right out. First time I’ve seen it in 20 years.

I disconnected and moved the server tower to make room in the front hall. Moved some furniture out of the way. Rolled up the rugs.

The Franklin stove weighs about 400 pounds. We tipped it to take off its feet and lowered it on to a pair of “one-by” fir strips. Slid it across the fir onto the dolly. Rolled the dolly onto the front porch. Drove up in the tractor and just lifted it off the dolly and put it down in the barn. It was waaaaaaay easier than it had any right to be.

The Vigilant was already up on 8″ blocks, so we lifted it to add a 2×6 and a 1×6 under each pair of feet. That brought it even with the top of the dolly so we simply “walked it” over. Backed and filled a bit with the dolly to get to the parlor hearth which turned out to be exactly the same height as the dolly. This was also remarkably easy.

We took one enclosure panel off, backed up the truck to the porch, and lifted the new-to-us Quadra Fire Santa Fe pellet stove down off the tailgate. I opted not to carry it in, so I did get to use my brand new, pneumatic tired hand truck. (As an aside, if you know who has my old red hand truck, let me know. I stole it fair and square 30 years ago and I want it back.) I rolled the stove right around the great room furniture and Bob’s yer uncle. It is sitting on the hearth right now.

We have moved all the furniture back that we moved out of the way and reconnected the server tower.

The next decision point was whether to sit it directly on the hearth or raise it another 8″ so its vent will go straight in to the chimney thimble. It was a looks v. convenience v. efficiency question. We opted for floor height and connected it up. It looks and works just fine.

I lied, though. My back already hurts.

Know anybody who wants to buy a nice Franklin stove or an even nicer Home Comfort coal stove?

Next up: Buying pellets. That turns out to be a trip in itself.