Friday, December 31, 2010 by Dick.

I grew up (professionally) in the Dark Ages¹ when employees set their own performance goals for the year and enshrined them in a “P.D.P.”

Liz Arden and I talked about that a little this morning. “I don’t make resolutions,” she said.

Neither do I. It struck me as odd since both of us are hardwired to achieve goals. We Floridians did make a few resolutions for next year, though:

• Make sure the body you bury at sea doesn’t walk ashore.
• Do not eat giant African snail mucus.
• Do not wear an underwire bra to a federal detention center.
• Learn CPR. And carry a sidearm.

A Tampa alligator snatched a Jack Russell terrier from its owner. The man shot at the gator which let go of the dog. The catatonic pet wasn’t breathing until the man revived it with CPR. Hope he had some extra pooper scooper bags. Resolved: teach Cardio Pet Resuscitation.

A Miami attorney was stopped from visiting her client because the underwire set off the metal detector. Guards wouldn’t let her in after she took it off because she was braless! Resolved: find a better class of jailers.

A Hialeah man convinced his followers to drink the juices of smuggled African snails as part of a religious “healing” ceremony. Several became ill, lost weight, and develop lumpy bellies. Resolved: find a new weight loss ceremony.

A couple who paid $8 for a box of bones at a yard sale found their Halloween decoration was a real dead guy. And a family buried a deceased relative at sea; the body resurfaced at a Fort Lauderdale beach. Broward Sheriff’s deputies are conferring with the Coast Guard to figure out what charges they can bring. Resolved: pass a new law about cutting the feet off relatives and selling them in garage sales.

“In business we fill out the form at the beginning of the period and file it,” Liz said. “Spend the year doing our jobs. At review time, we sit down, pull out the form, and look for all the ways what we really did met the stuff we wrote down.”

And that’s why resolutions don’t work.

288 years ago, more than 100 years after 102 English reprobates and separatists set foot in the New World, Puritan theologian Jonathan Edwards prescribed reading his 70 resolutions at least once each and every week. I hope he was able to do so; it’s the right prescription for keeping them.

Happy New Year, everyone!

¹ “Management by Objectives is a process of defining objectives within an organization so that management and employees agree to the objectives and understand what they are in the organization…

“The essence of MBO is participative goal setting, choosing course of actions and decision making. An important part of the MBO is the measurement and the comparison of the employee’s actual performance with the standards set.”

Posted in History, Business, Sociology, Holidays, Random Access | 2 Comments »

Wednesday, December 29, 2010 by Dick.

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Monday, December 27, 2010 by Dick.

Only 14 of the 60 Vermont school districts and supervisory unions have met the spending cuts required by the Legislature and the Department of Education.

Vermont Act 68, the “Challenges for Change” law: “It is hereby enacted by the General Assembly of the State of Vermont:
“In fiscal year 2011, the secretary shall reduce the general fund appropriation and transfer to the education fund by $3,966,375.00. It is expected that … total local education spending … will be reduced by $13,332,500.” As amended, the Vermont program to increase efficiency and cut budgets across most of Vermont government, requires all schools across the state to reduce the amount they raised by taxes by $23.3 million.

They didn’t.

46 school districts and supervisory unions appear to be breaking the law.

Australian site whyshouldi.com tell us “When someone doesn’t obey the law, we say that they have broken the law. Sometimes, people get hurt or suffer when laws are broken. Injured people are called victims. When some laws are broken, everyone feels afraid. Not just the victim.

“We call these things crimes and the people who commit these crimes are criminals. We also believe that criminals must be punished. There are many types of crime, such as assault, stealing, or murder.”

Australia apparently expects people, businesses, and governmental units to obey the law.

Not Vermont.

Back to whyshouldi.com: “One of your property rights is for you to lend your belongings to somebody, or share them with your friends and family. Do they have to ask you first, or pay you for the use of something? That is up to you – it’s your property.

“Some cultures have a different view. In many Indigenous communities, families and friends may use or borrow each other’s property without getting permission every time. Many people around the world think that land belongs to a group or tribe, rather than one person.”

Ahh. That would apparently be Vermont.

Under Challenges for Change, schools reported last week that they had achieved cuts of $7.5 million, $15.8 million short.

Vermont Governor-elect Peter Shumlin has a plan.
Mr. Shumlin will urge lawmakers to transfer $19 million in federal funds to the schools to cover the $15.8 million shortfall. (Congress had approved that “stimulus” money to prevent teacher layoffs.)

Ya gotta love Mr. Shumlin’s arithmetic.

Law < ——————————————– > Short

In a typical (liberal) political move, the guv-to-be lets 46 lawbreakers off by throwing more money we don’t have at them. It’s OK, though. He got the money from the Feds.

And here I thought Vermont was supposed to stand for self-reliance.

Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose.

Posted in Throw Da Bums Out, Politics & News, Random Access | 5 Comments »

Saturday, December 25, 2010 by Dick.

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Friday, December 24, 2010 by Dick.

Posted in Wordless, Holidays | 1 Comment »

Thursday, December 23, 2010 by Dick.

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