How Low Can You Go?

I am just sooooo tired of you airheads. Politics ain’t a limbo contest.

limbo barAn open letter to Jim Messina and Stephanie Cutter on the Left, Matt Rhoades and Kevin Madden on the Right:

The Thief-in-Chief calls the Candidate-in-Chief a “liar or a felon” over the date he signed some papers.

Let us not forget that the Loyal Opposition has long claimed the Thief-in-Chief has no papers.

The Candidate-in-Chief retorted “liar liar pants on fire” about the Thief-in-Chief.

Let us not forget that the Loyalists have long claimed the Candidate-in-Chief is an evil, religious, rich guy.

I don’t give a hoot.

I don’t have a job.

Barack Obama made more money in Illinois selling political favors than you made in all of 2001. I don’t care.

Mitt Romney made more money last night than you made last year. I don’t care.

See, I read the news. I already know what Barack Obama has done to this country for the past three years. No amount of sleight-of-hand or political spin will change that although I have noticed he is running on “change” again. I also know what Mitt Romney has done for the past twenty years.

“I fixed the auto industry!” Mr. Obama crows in his ads. Sure. Stealing General Motors from its stockholders and introducing the worst selling car since the Aztek (which itself sold 112 more cars than the Edsel) is a great fix.

Mr. Obama? Quit it. Just stand up there in front of your record unemployment, your record public debt, your Chicago politics and tell us step-by-step how you are going to fix what you’ve done.

“I know what it’s like to worry whether you’re gonna get fired,” Mr. Romney said in New Hampshire.

Mr. Romney? Quit it. Just stand up there in front of your record at Bain, good and bad, your Olympics record, your Massachusetts record, and tell us step-by-excruciating-step what you will do to fix this mess.

otterMy friend Dean “Dino” Russell is a roofer in the middle Keys. Dancing about on roofs all his life has made him the most physically fit man in the Home Depot and gives him a unique overview of life. Dino noted that, “What this country needs is a veterinary service that will spay and neuter otters at a reasonable rate, not another third-rate carnival barker who can do the limbo.”

And, for the record? Until the IRS tells me otherwise, I figure Barack Obama and Mitt Romney followed the tax code to the letter and paid exactly the taxes they each owed. As did Mortimer Zuckerman and Warren Buffett and David Koch and Sheldon Adelson. And me.

And I don’t even have a job.

Lordy Lordy™.

UPDATE – UPDATE – UPDATE – UPDATE – UPDATEJuly 21, 2012 — “We will pull all the ‘comparison’ ads.”

July 22, 2012 — CBS Sunday Morning today aired the singing Romney ad. “Approved by Barack Obama. Paid for by Obama for America.” CBS’ Face the Nation today aired the “You can change” ad. Paid for by Karl Rove’s American Crossroads PAC.

Good to see nothing ever changes.

3 thoughts on “How Low Can You Go?

  1. I don’t have a job either.

    I was mowing my front lawn — outside the 8-foot wall — and a Mexican guy came by and offered to edge it for five dollars. He had his little gas machine. It took him ten minutes; and I gave him five and a cold beer when he finished.

    That’s five bucks the IRS will never hear about.

    Three days ago a negro gal came up to me in the parking lot at the gym and asked for fifty cents because she said she was hungry. I told her to keep her hands where I could see them, and I gave her some folding money.

    IRS won’t see that either.

    As Herr Blogmeister points, Romney made more money before I took my first dump this morning than I will give to charity in a lifetime.

    But then…I don’t have a job.

    — George

  2. Herr Blogmeister, thank your for cleaning up my gutterage and posting my comment, as I live in a world dominated by small, flitting, female replicas of my daughters-in-law; and I have scant opportunities to use swear words — as I must maintain my faux image of an upstanding gentleman.

    But the words of my humble comment are warranted as truth.

    Jobs are hard to come by, and people who have them should hang onto them with due dilligence. With judicial editing of the the words of William Warfield, who sang Ol’ Man River in *Showboat* (damn that was a good flick) — “them that lose them are soon forgotten”.

    I AM in the fourth quarter of my century of life, and I still work when asked. I feel grief for the lost souls in my ethnically mixed neighborhood who have been raised to believe that government is their provider. Life for them will be tough when there are no more tax-paying roots (there’s that word again) to feed the tree of life that has supported them all their lives and the lives of their forebearers.

    Again, feel free to edit my rambling to assure that it makes sense to your astute liberal readers.

Comments are closed.