At the end of each year, we tot up the people who died and I wonder if, years from now, if there will be any people of accomplishment whom we mourn. This year, we lost:
NASA’s Alberto Behar.
Batmobile creator George Barris
Civil rights activist Grace Lee Boggs
Physicist Val Fitch
Medical researcher Alfred Gilman
Activist and Nearly an Astronaut Jane Hart
American chemist Richard Heck
Mathematician John Nash
Actress Maureen O’Hara
Marine aviator Frank Petersen
So what noteworthy, prize-winning event or invention or legislation happened this year?
It became illegal to pose for a selfie with a tiger in New York.
The Far Green got the largest city in the U.S. to ban polystyrene foam simply because the Far Green is determined to cut down our forests. Want to save the environment? Political “science” isn’t real. Study real science.
We caught Mr. Obama in 1,157 lies, starting with his first State of the Union and most recently with “I will give up vacations” which he did again this week.
!@#$%^Comcast earned its name, at least as far as “Asshole Brown,” “Super Bitch” Bauer, and “Bitch Dog” Govan are concerned. The company’s CEO, Brian “Dummy Whore” Roberts, approved.
Toyota sold a Partial Zero Emission Vehicle.
Say what?
In California.
Figures.
A federal judge ruled that Boardwalk Pizza here in the Keys didn’t infringe on the Garden State Parkway’s trademark, basically ruling the Parkway’s lawsuit half-baked.
Miami-Dade Animal Services removed 42 Chihuahuas from a Miami-Dade home. There was no abuse; Animal Services cited “uncontrolled breeding.”
A 61-year old postal carrier managed to land his flying bicycle on the Capitol lawn.
The Marathon, Florida, Home Depot has ice scrapers for sale in the heart of the Florida Keys.
Texas A&M Professor Irwin Horwitz called his Strategic Management students “a disgrace to the school” for cheating and other academic dishonor. Then he flunked every last one of them. Results of today’s search of Texas A&M Faculty for Mr. Horwitz: “No matches found.”
We discovered that the same people in the First World who would fire Mr. Horwitz believe they can change the climate but not one of them could make it rain in California to end the drought there.
People nearly went on strike to return to the hyperinflation of the go-go 80s. A huge swath of American lib’ruls are too young to remember those extraordinary days of 15-21% mortgage interest.
Having learned how by stealing General Motors from stockholders like thee and me, Mr. Obama did the same to the coal industry: he broke it and handed it to George Soros.
Vermont’s plans for a statewide amnesty day made the news. “Drivers!” Billy Mays might have shouted, “get your suspended license reinstated for the low, low cost of just $20 per ticket.” It was a one day only deal! Until the next time.
Vermont Health Connect went offline for another software upgrade. The website went dark so the latest, newest, greatest, most perfect software could be uploaded. Again.
City residents in Plattsburgh NY learned that they will be fined if they don’t clear the snow off their own property.
Fortunately it pretty much hasn’t snowed in Plattsburgh NY or North Puffin since last spring.
We had the best pope and the worst politicians. I predickted that the 2016 general election would be Trump v. Sanders.
There was some light in 2015.
“Stephen Hawking dead”: After the Brief History of Time author was killed by an Internet death hoax, we found that he is, fortunately, still very much alive.
je suis Charlie came to life around the world after an horrific religious murder in Paris.
NASA found evidence of water on Mars.
Astronomers discovered “Fat Jupiter” which got kicked out of the solar system, twin planets that could host life, and a host of other findings about our galactic neighbors.
UNC researchers discovered “Q-carbon,” a new phase of carbon that makes it possible to create a diamond at room temperature and atmospheric pressure.
Scientists discovered 211 new species in the Eastern Himalayas.
3D-Printing moved into medicine to make a sternum and ribs for a cancer patient and prosthetic limbs for pets.
Nest Labs opened a new engineering center inside Google’s Kirkland campus to “enable other people to do it.”
Welcome back! Blue Origin test-launched its New Shepard rocket to the edge of space and then brought it home land in Texas. The SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket lifted off at Cape Canaveral with a payload of eleven satellites. The rocket returned to land upright.
It is hard, after decades of tying shoelaces the same way day-after-day to learn a new trick but it can be done.
NASA Scientist Alberto Behar helped to prove that there had once been water on Mars.
Auto customizer and Batmobile creator George Barris built some of the best known cars that never really existed.
Civil rights activist Grace Lee Boggs founded Detroit Summer, a multicultural intergenerational youth program, and the Boggs Center to Nurture Community Leadership.
Physicist Val Fitch discovered the CP violation, an idea he said was “a great stumbling block for physicists to accept.”
Medical researcher Alfred Gilman shared the Nobel Prize in Medicine for the discovery of G proteins.
Activist and Nearly an Astronaut Jane Hart made the cut with 12 other women to become known as the Mercury 13. NASA, however, continued to insist that only qualified test pilots could enter its astronaut program and did not admit women until 1978, in a class that included Sally Ride.
American chemist Richard Heck invented tools to fight cancer and produce thin computer screens.
Mathematician John Nash eventually received the Nobel Prize in Economics for his work on game theory.
Actress Maureen O’Hara was one of the last surviving stars from the Golden Age of Hollywood. “I prefer the company of men except for Maureen O’Hara. She’s a great guy,” John Wayne said.
Marine aviator (and the first black Marine flier), Lt. Gen. Frank Petersen, served the Corps for 38 years.
In case you thought I’d forgotten about politics, in 2015 I republished Harper’s Inimitable Impressive Inflationary Indicator. It’s practically perfect in every way:Haircuts and movie ticket costsHaircuts and movie ticket costs tell us more about the economy than the BLS’ poke-in-the-eye-with-a-sharp-stick.
“Miami-Dade Animal Services removed 42 Chihuahuas from a Miami-Dade home. There was no abuse; Animal Services cited ‘uncontrolled breeding.’ ”
So… is there really a law in Miami against “uncontrolled breeding” of dogs? Or is the bureaucracy legislating again?
No. Apparently it’s a law in the state:
823.15. Dogs and cats released from animal shelters or animal control agencies; sterilization requirement
Amended 2013; New Text:
(1) The Legislature has determined that the importation of dogs and cats into, and the uncontrolled breeding of dogs and cats in, this state pose risks to the well-being of dogs and cats, the health of humans and animals, and the agricultural interests in this state…
“Uncontrolled breeding” is defined only as “many.” Really.